Day 2: Educate You on Something

I would love to be able to write about softball in some way. Everything I can think to explain would really be most appropriate to explain using pictures. No one in sports learns how to hit a ball by reading a pamphlet.  So, I'll do something grammar related. I get pretty fired up about this one. I don't mean to sound condescending, but I can't express my frustration without sounding like a know-it-all. So screw it. Put your big-girl panties on and read!

Please learn how to use (OR NOT USE) the apostrophe. It's driving me insane.  Businesses are using social media more and more to advertise and communicate with consumers. That means that any yahoo who doesn't know how to write using correct standard grammar can get online and post messages that make the business look ridiculously stupid. Stop it. It's not a hard rule to learn. Seriously. There are much harder things to figure out.  Oh ,and it's not just social media. Every single time I go to the YMCA, I have to look at a HUGE poster that says:

Thank you to the Bennett's for their donation.

REALLY!? It's a huge poster!! You are in the SIGN business!! Learn how to use (OR NOT USE) and apostrophe!!!

Another favorite is at On the Border. One page of the menu reads:

Burritos and Chimi's

REALLY!? This a national restaurant chain.  How many people probably proofread that entire menu? And this is a huge heading! I'm not a genius. I'm your standard English teacher. Are they not hiring grammar and language experts? THESE ARE THE PEOPLE WHO SHOULD BE SETTING THE EXAMPLE.

Okay. Rant over. This this post is supposed to be informative. (Whoopsie!) I will just post a few examples of how to and how NOT to use the apostrophe.

Plural/Not Plural Basics
Correct:
House margaritas tonight. Come on in and get one from our bartenders!
Incorrect:
House margarita's tonight. Come on in and get one from our bartender's!

It's just plural, people.

Names
If you are writing your family's name, it should appear like this:
If your last name is Williams...

The Williamses are home. (More than one person with the last name Williams is home.)
The Williams' garage is on fire. (The home belonging to the Williams family has an issue.)
I hate the Williamses. They are always throwing fireworks into our yard. (It's just plural. Don't pop in an apostrophe.)
This post from the Williams lady is becoming boring.  (One lady. With the name Williams. Don't add an apostrophe. Moving on.)

Decades
This one has been driving me crazy.
Correct:
I loved the '70s. (Note, the apostrophe indicating the missing 19 is optional.  I usually just write 70s.)
Incorrect:
I've been using the apostrophe incorrectly since the 70's.
It's so easy, I'm only giving one example.

Acronyms
Another one that people misuse all the time...
Correct:
I can't wait until the CMAs. Blake Shelton will probably be drunk.
Incorrect:
I can't wait until the CMA's. Oh, and by the way I don't know how to use an apostrophe.
Why is this the rule? Because this acronym is short for Country Music Awards. NOT Country Music Award's.

Oh, and your kid didn't get all A's.  He got all As.